People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) does not see fit to extend the same moral courtesy to human animals, specifically the female kind. In the organization’s latest sexist campaign for vegetarianism, an overweight woman in a bikini is faced with the emboldened slogan: “Save the Whales”. Beneath the words runs a helpful tagline: “Lose the blubber: go vegetarian.”

Come on gals, take a joke. What’s a little fat-shaming in pursuit of a good time?

There’s no shortage of adjectives (or profanities) that come to mind to describe such a mean-spirited billboard. And if you can get through the confusion of it – don’t be a whale! wait, save the whales! don’t be a whale so we can save the whales! whales are great, except you, blubber butt! – it’s also very telling.

A friend of mine, John Haslett, is a professional adventurer and author of the sea memoir, Voyage of the Manteno. In the book, he writes about the behavior of people in survival situations – that is, people under extreme stress. An inevitable few will rapidly decline into paranoia and eventual insanity. Some – many more than you would think, observes Haslett – simply give up. Some rise to the challenge, while others become childish or cheat. I think we can figure out which part of the life raft we’d find PETA hugging.

With admirably relentless energy, PETA has managed to jump from the margins of activism and enjoys frequent mainstream media attention. To the dismay of many vegetarians, when Newkirk speaks, people do listen. A group like PETA has just as much potential to wear at our social fabric as any loudmouth pundit. These are not just crazy tactics; PETA’s stunts are part of a carefully-woven, and unfortunate, strategy. Deliberately divisive, PETA is antisocial in a wide cultural sense. Desperate to win, they resort to the ridiculous and alienate those whom they hope to convert. What a dark, lonely world these small-minded people inhabit! I don’t know about you, but I don’t want anyone this stressed out trying to advocate for anything except another cocktail.

The woman who is concerned with social and environmental justice should be quick to leave PETA to the spiral it’s so enthusiastically sliding down. Sociologists explain that it’s common for oppressed groups to target each other as they jockey for autonomy. PETA abusing using women as a tool to achieve their goals is just one more example in a long history of horizontal violence. Not very original, is it? One can easily imagine that in the hive-mind of PETA headquarters, there is only room for the conflict view of reality: it’s either women for animals or women over animals. I guess PETA can’t conceive of women and animals, or at least not for the blubbery among us!

Any position worth defending can be done with integrity. If you have to take a cheap shot to score a point, you don’t belong in the game. Or put another way, when the end justifies the means, the means become the end.

Recommended reading on this topic: Feministing, Deceiver, Jezebel, Huffington Post, The Frisky, DoubleX

First up – is there really such thing as a green gadget? Answer: define “green”, says Wired. And is it really cheaper to recover gold from junked electronics than to mine it out of the ground? (Amateur gold panners, please form an orderly queue at your local landfill.)

Things doubling up as other things afterward – we like. So Paul Clark’s design for a plant pot doubling as a birdhouse – seen here at designspotter – is an intriguing idea (and perfect for my allotment-mad corner of the world).

A holiday with a difference – you’re stuffed into a sphere and slung into the trees. In fact, this prospect is far from nightmarish, as Twilight Earth explains.

Handmade goods are doing great: the economy, well, not so much. The Etsy revolution (and that really is beginning to look like the right word) currently represents around $90 million of commerce every year and growing. Clive Thompson takes a fascinated look at Wired, via Apartment Therapy.

Eco-friendly heater upgrades: brilliant idea. And lots of money up front. Ouch. So it’s nice to see the new administration is keen to lend a helping hand, in the form of very welcome tax credits.

Oh PETA. Why, PETA, why? Again and again, you make us feel older than our years. And now this? Can we get back to the business at hand, please?

Fashion websites should absolutely drip with style, yes? The same way dentists should have good teeth. Take a look at Smashing Magazine’s round-up of the most beautiful sites out there – via The Steel Closet – and attempt to resist their formidable charms. (Bet you can’t.)

You can do anything with LEDs. Even – prepare yourself – Extreme Sheep Art. You heard me. Or how about this?

We’ve been following Josh Dorfman – a.k.a. The Lazy Environmentalist – for a while now, and we were delighted to hear about his new book The Lazy Environmentalist On A Budget: Save Money, Save Time, Save The Planet – and he’ll be on the Sundance Channel this June, as Ecorazzi reports.

If you want to make your business sustainable – truly sustainable – it’s about utilizing creativity, cutting-edge business practices and more interdependency than ever before. It’s about facilitating small-scale “minipreneurs” so they can thrive. It’s a new business model for a new era.

Meet the latest tool in the fight against pollution – chickens! Or rather, what chickens leave behind. As Planetsave reports, it turns out that chicken poop seems to act as a catalyst for the breakdown of crude oil in the soil.

Where do you think you rate on the Global Rich List? Higher than you expect.

It’s the weekend – time to switch off the computer and get out into the “real world”? Except that line is getting awfully blurred. Do you Twitter? Use a Blackberry? So when exactly are you actually offline? As Max Gladwell quips, who needs Second Life when the everyday world is getting just as wacky and wired?

And lastly…true love has rarely had such dire consequences!

Image: masochismtango

Fluff and Nonsense: PETA Denies Fish Exist (October 2008)

Because much of the natural world is generally eww gross and lacking in cuteness, PETA are eager to helpfully rename the birds and the beasts so they’re more appealing. First to get a makeover? Fish. They’re now called Sea Kittens, and the official website plasters on the sentiment with a trowel, featuring a storybook containing heavily anthropomorphic fish suffering at the hands of evil humans. There are some good points here – such as how fish are generally a lot smarter than we give them credit for – but as usual, they’re buried in fathoms of uncompromising bluster. PETA wants to stop all fishing immediately, or ideally yesterday. But what would our cute, meowing “Land Fish” eat for their dinner?

It’s all so ripe for ridicule. So here’s some. Fin.

Breeding Trouble: A Canine Klan Clanger (February 2009)

The End Justifies The Means, right? During their protest at the recent Westminster Dog Show, PETA members dressed up in Klu Klux Klan garb while they handed out leaflets, equating dog-breeders to the infamous militant white supremacists and claiming that selective breeding exacerbates pet overpopulation problem. (PETA’s opponents have already labeled them hypocrites on this issue).

So how did the public react when it was approached by people dressed as hooded racists?

“Most passers-by seemed more puzzled than offended, though those who didn’t stop walked away thinking they really had seen the KKK.”

- AP, quoted in the Los Angeles Times.

Oh well. Any reaction is a good reaction, right? Best foot forward, PETA.

Shock PETA Advert Featuring Women Wearing Clothes (January 2009)

Sex sells. And in this case, it sells vegetables – or it would do, if NBC had agreed to air PETA’s sleazefest of a Superbowl advert. In it, young women don skimpy outfits and gyrate ecstatically around groceries, accompanied with the tagline “Studies Show Vegetarians Have Better Sex” (because they’re generally slimmer and healthier, the “logic” goes).

So how did it get onto Youtube and the like? Because getting it rejected was the plan all along, of course, and as soon as NBC gave it a thumbs-down, the PETA marketing machine sprung into action. Sexist? You bet - but it’s all in a good cause (and it’s not as if they were naked, because that would be grossly demeaning. Ah, right). Meanwhile, women across the world find themselves too embarrassed to be seen shopping for vegetables in public, and send the men out instead. Thanks a bunch, PETA.

Michael Vick Fails To Score: PETA’s Version of Redemption (January 2009)

For former Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick, it’s not been a good couple of years. In 2007 he was convicted of running a dog-fighting ring on his property in Surrey County, Virginia – and he’s currently serving a 23-month federal prison sentence. In 2008 Vick filed for bankruptcy (just two years earlier, he was amongst the top ten richest athletes in America), and his former employers recently washed their hands of him, scuppering his chances of continuing his career when he’s released.

Cue PETA. They offered Vick the chance to feature in an advert condemning dog-fighting – on condition he filled out an animal empathy test, marked out of 100. Vick agreed…and scored 73.5%. And we know this because PETA not only released the score, but published a pdf of Vick’s answers on their website. Sorry, Michael, you’ve been taken for a ride. It’s a stunt to further sully your reputation (if that’s possible). Meanwhile, we suspect PETA would rate poorly on our Contrite Human Being Empathy Test.

Cooking Mama Knows Best While PETA Skips A Key Ingredient (November 2008)

If you can’t get through to the adults, target the kids. There’s a game on the Nintendo DS handheld gaming console called “Cooking Mama” (Majesco Entertainment), in which the elements of meal-preparation (vegetable chopping & peeling, food preparation and so on) are turned into mini-games played against the clock. PETA’s beef (so to speak) is with the use of meat in the game – so they released their own blood-soaked, thoroughly disturbing version aimed at…er, well, we don’t know who it’s aimed at. Meat eaters will love it, that’s for sure. Majesco recently responded thus:

“{Mama says:] Like any accomplished cook, I create my recipes to appeal to a broad range of tastes and preferences…while Mama is not a vegetarian, she fully supports the humane treatment of animals.”

In other words, Mama advocates tolerance. Now there’s a message for our kids. Unfortunately, these five stunts are only the latest in a long history of ridiculous pranks from PETA.

Additional: By no means all of PETA’s actions are founded on shock tactics, infringements on human dignity and general negativity. (If they were, the stunts listed above wouldn’t be so frustrating.) Their recent positive action to buy up stock in traditionally meat-heavy fast food industries is something we’ll be following with interest, since anything that directly turns the American diet around gets our vote. More like this, please.

Images: jon hanson / -=RoBeE=- / zenera / nineball2727 / MoonSoleil.

Image: striatic

Let’s pretend we have a mutual friend. We’ll called him Peter.

There’s a lot to like about Peter: he’s deeply concerned about his impact on the environment, he donates time to local community projects, he’s thoughtful, charismatic and likeable. But there’s something odd about Peter, something deeply Out To Lunch – and every so often, this weirdness springs out of him. He builds a floodlit shrine out of recycled credit cards outside the local Walmart and surrounds it with pictures of flowers and animals. He paints all the streetlights green within a 20-mile radius. He throws miniature wooden oil-derricks at cars as he cycles to work. In short, Peter would be an admirable, inspiring pillar of the community…if he didn’t behave like an utter fruitcake.

It’s how we feel about People For the Ethical Treatment of Animals. Their investigations into animal testing and cruelty deserve our respect and our support. PETA’s principles? We admire them. PETA’s methods? Well, not so much. The organization has run more stunts than Evel Knievel – and while it’s always a blast to see what heights of lunacy they’ve scaled recently, we rather wish they wouldn’t. (Their work is just too important to be discredited by something ill-judged).

With that in mind, let’s look at 7 of their most notoriously awful publicity stunts.

Image: XWRN

A Grave Error: Playing Chicken With KFC (January 2008)

Upon discovering where Kentucky Fried Chicken founder Colonel Harland Sanders (above) is buried, PETA did what any of us might have done in a heartbeat, which was to purchase a plot of land within the cemetary, erect a fake headstone dedicated to someone who is in fact alive and well, and inscribe a poem on the stone which secretly spells out “KFC Tortures Birds“. Unsurprisingly this ruffled a few feathers: KFC described it as “a disgustingly disrespectful way to disgrace the resting place of the departed”. We sympathize. (Still, you have to admire their pluck).

Bull in a china shop: Winning New Friends in India (January 2008)

“PETA blindfolds Ghandi.” There’s a headline to make you spit your drink. Bypassing diplomatic channels and cultural respect, PETA went straight for the jugular in their protest against the Tamil practice of jallikatu or bull-taunting. While everyone was looking the other way, three PETA protesters leapt up and flung a blindfold round a statue of Mahatma Ghandi in Coimbatore’s Ghandi Park. Local authorities took a dim view, throwing the book at PETA and blaming them for “creating religious ill-feeling, defaming the national leader, trespassing and also [infingements of the] Tamil Nadu Open Places Prevention of Disfigurement Act.” Meanwhile, the real issue (and there is a real issue) gets associated with fringe activists. Way to bring it to the table, guys.

Image: tanakawho

The Fur Flies: Coats Sent To Iraq and Given To The Homeless (2004 to Present)

While they’re most famous for their anti-fur stance, PETA have adopted the practice of giving away the fur that is donated to them. In 2004 this included fur coats sent to suffering people in Iraq. A similar measure – one deplored by other anti-fur protest groups – is PETA’s “fur kitchens” which give away coats to homeless people. You could argue this is a caring, humanitarian measure – until you factor in the following quote from PETA’s President Ingrid Newkirk: “When the homeless are wearing fur, you know fur has hit rock bottom.”

Streaking Ahead: PETA’s Naked Ambition

One of PETA’s trademarks is nudity. Nary a month goes by without somebody famous donning their birthday suit to highlight the cause célèbre of PETA vs. fur clothing. It’s a bit of fun, a bit of titillation and a lot of exposure (as it were) for the person stripping off for the public eye. It’s expected of them – and when it doesn’t quite happen, as in the recent case of Amanda Beard, it raises eyebrows. But for potential eyebrow height, it’s difficult to top the sight of naked PETA members lying in flower-lined coffins to protest against Avian Flu. However, this manages it.

Image: OiMax

Milking Controversy: PETA’s Ice-Cream Boob (September 2008)

Three months back, Swiss restaurant owner Hans Locher announced he would be preparing dishes using human breast milk. Spotting a bandwagon with room to sit, PETA then sent a public letter to Ben And Jerry’s asking why they can’t follow suit by replacing the cow’s milk in their ice cream with human milk.  Suspecting that their sales might suffer, B & J’s refused (known as the Ross Geller response).

Interning with PETA: It’s A Wrap (June 2008)

To work for PETA, you have to be ready to take life on the chin. In the case of an intern and a volunteer in June of this year, you have to be ready to be liberally spattered with fake blood, shrink-wrapped to a cardboard sheet and endure an hour in the baking (80 degrees+) midday sun. No animals were harmed during the production of this stunt, but volunteer Shawn Herbold noted that she was “in pain and feeling nauseated” halfway through her shift. Some people just love to complain.

Image: MikeLicht:NotionsCapital.com

$1 Million: A Chance to Shmeat New People? (2008 onwards)

Taking a firm stance against the way animal meat is produced for consumption (and we’re right beside PETA on this), the organization has offered a $1 million prize to anyone who can create vat-grown meat as an alternative (er…PETA, you go that way and we’ll go this way). It’s claimed that it will act as a catalyst for developing truly viable in vitro “shmeat”. Salon nicely outlines why this is sloppy thinking…and anyway, isn’t it yet another example of the curse of Things That Look Like Other Things?

PETA – please, enough.

(Oh, we’re not naïve. Articles like this one are exactly why PETA members make fools of themselves – all to get their message across. But do you think antics like these are helping that message – or hindering it?)